Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Fellow Young People

Disclaimer: I am not a major theologian. I am not claiming to be. I don't even WANT to be. I just had a thought and went with it. This was not intended to offend anyone. If you disagree with me, fine. I am truly going off feeling and feeling alone. With that being said........

It has come to my attention that there are very few Christian Marriage Retreats aimed at young people. RANDOM - I know. Not even just marriage retreats. Heck, forget the "being married" part all together. There are very few Christian Retreats aimed at the development of young people for marriage, if that is a person's calling.

My point - everyone is all hyped up about the "death of marriage" and that over 50% of Christian marriages end in divorce. Ok - Christian, Catholic, Faith-based, whatever. The fact is - marriage is a dying art, not sure if that is an appropriate comparison but ANYWAYS....why in Bob's name, are there marriage retreats, after rebuilding marriage bible studies, after 'Weekend to Remember' events, after “Focus on the Family” affairs, after another - all aimed at OLDER (not OLD, older) people? Those who have been married for years and years. Why? I mean, I get it. I do. Empty nest syndrome. Those who are getting the '7-year itch' (which has turned into the '2 year itch' it seems).

And is the Church really stooping to the level of marketing their organization and religious affiliation by claiming "life-long marriages only last when the couple goes to church" - ? Are they really doing that? Yes. People should go to Church if they want. However, doesn't church mean where there is a group of people gathering in God's name? This is a hot topic- I'm sure. Again - not a serious Bible thumper but isn't there a verse that talks about this? I will find it later. I only say this because the “church” building cannot save marriages – people and God and Biblical truth save marriages, relationships, families, homes, friendships...etc.

I love this statement from Ken Ham, "...those who read the Bible seriously and without compromise put their faith as a much higher priority in their lives. As a result, they lead very different lives, to include some of the lowest divorce rates in the country, well below the atheists, agnostics, and general public. Interestingly, those who profess faith in Jesus Christ but not in what the Bible teaches appear little different than the rest of the world"

It's not about going to church, saying you’re a Christian and being 'good'. It's about the real, nitty gritty of the Faith, what the Bible says and commands of us, Christians, that distinguishes a successful marriage from an unsuccessful marriage. If you and your partner have the same priority, which is God, and truly follow the Bible and all it has in store for you, your marriage should be successful. The Bible is our handbook.

This brings me back to my original point - young people! Why are there SO MANY dagum retreats and workshops and bible studies aimed at those who are already married and NOT SO MANY dagum retreats and workshops and bible studies aimed at those who are on their way to be married or would like to be some day????

Beth Moore does a good job in her Esther study - well to me at least - of showing us how Women should be, according to the Bible. But, in my opinion, I feel like the dudes of the world need to know their role as well as the Woman's role in a relationship, life, whatever. Both sides should understand and attempt to familiarize themselves with the inner and outer workings of the opposite sex's brain, heart, and soul! So, here is my proposition. We need to find or make or orchestrate one of these events. We need elders, wise, older people, those with testimony and expertise in regard to gender roles, and a really good, YOUNG advertising and marketing guru.

We need to break the cycle. Yes, repairing broken marriages is awesome and I am all for it. I can’t imagine how heartbreaking it is to watch your parents’ divorce. But think about it, what do young married couples do when disaster strikes? They turn to what they know best – whether that is television or other couples they know who might have good marriages or might not. We need to fix what’s been broken….but we need to go to the source, the beginning, the roots and foundational layer of a relationship. For some people, that might be when they are still dating, when they are single, or when they are one week from saying “I do”.  Young people need to be equipped with what “real faith” means and what their role is according to the Bible, (obviously adapted to present day society because I don’t know about you, but I can’t be as submissive as I am probably supposed to be), all while understanding their partner’s (opposite sex’s) role. It’s about accountability, and not because I’m an accountant. I think many would be surprised by the oodles of young people, soon to be college graduates, and real-world newbies who are dying to know their role and who, like me, are fixated on gender roles but who need to know Biblical truth.

Side note - here is the verse I was looking for earlier: Matthew 18:20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

Ok – I’m done. Now, let’s do something…please???

5 comments:

Jamie said...

Is it that the marketing is not toward young couples or is it that young couples are not interested in the help or do not think they need it? I feel like our generation--especially us girls--are much more independent than older generations and in general have a feeling of "I can do this myself." But truthfully, a successful, happy marriage takes a LOT of work and insight from our older, wiser married friends. Love the post!

Jessica said...

I do think it is attributable to marketing and the attitudes of our generation. I could not agree more! I just wanted to spark a thought in people's minds, that foundations need to be properly laid first. Then, of course, you will always have "repair work" throughout the years. Thanks for reading and for the comment :)

Jewels said...

It is great that you are thinking about this now. There is a study called The Song of Solomon that we did at BUMC at about 10 years into our marriage. I couldn't help but think each week how helpful this study would have been before marriage.
Here is the link:http://www.songofsolomon.com/
By Tommy Nelson

Jessica said...

Thanks! I will have to check it out!

Jessica said...

Oh! I have heard Tommy Nelson speak - I went to Denton Bible once. It was great!