Colic Shmolic

Once our daughter was diagnosed with silent reflux, ie. the silent parent killer...kidding... I got to work on ways to try to help her before resorting to meds. We aren't for or against vaccines or meds but, she was SO little and giving a baby strong steroids was really not ideal for us or my conscience. I've written this out for so many friends and family, I thought it was time to just post it!

First things first, if anyone tells you that your baby has colic, as if it's just a thing that happens and there is nothing you can do about it - shame on them and keep looking for answers. Babies cry for a REASON. They wake up in the night screaming for a REASON. It is not normal or acceptable, it is absolutely not your fault, and I highly encourage you to SEEK HELP, RESEARCH, and ASK QUESTIONS.

After visiting with doctors, scouring the internet, meeting with a certified lactation consultant - here is a run down of all I know now and ALL.THE.THINGS we did to help - either that or she outgrew it! Which is kind of fantastic, too. I've also attached links to the products purchased below.

1. I know this sounds obvious but, you'd be surprised (I mean, have you read some of these mom group questions? You know what I'm talking about) - eliminate anything that makes your tummy rumble like foods, drinks or vitamins high in fiber. In fact, if nursing, I would eliminate all of that from the beginning - including all dairy and coffee and coke (any diuretics and caffeinated products).

2. I found, during our research, that babies who aren’t fully developed often have this issue - though a LOT of full term/larger and older babies have it, too. They either don’t have a proper flap (I'm not a doctor so bare with me, the thing attached to their esophagus that can cause hiccups!) so any milk intake can come up and it can burn! Also, their tummy and digestive system may not produce enough cell salt (a natural tums/antacid). You can help both of these and hopefully, eventually, God-willing baby will outgrow it (that’s some good news). Cell salt used and regimen followed is below.

3. When nursing - this was INCREDIBLY helpful to know - your milk sacs are made up of things like grapes. So when you squeeze a grape, juice comes out and then there is the gooey stuff attached to the grape's skin. Well your thick and heavy milk sticks to the “skin” of these sacs - yes, there is some even if you are past the colostrum stage. Your goal should be to release or detach the heavy milk from the milk sac/skin and nurse until your breast is completely, totally empty. I used to nurse equal lengths of time on both sides, mainly because I heard stories where some babies ended up with a preference of side - which, compared to silent reflux, is the least of my worries! I understand the importance of nursing until one side is totally empty and simply offering the second breast if they're still hungry (then start the next feeding on the side you ended with). Allowing baby to get that thick, hind milk ensures the weight of the milk will stay down in baby's tummy better. This is also why reflux seems to "go away", because they start to eat heavier foods eventually. THE TRICK: To help aid in getting the hind/heavy milk to release from the milk sac, if you seem to have trouble, is this - towards the end of a feeding, microwave a sock filled with rice for about 30 seconds or less, hold it on your breast (be careful it's not too hot because it will be touching baby, potentially) to warm your breast, and massage all around as she nurses.

4. Nurse baby at as high of an angle is comfortable for you.

5. Also, don't lay baby down or put them on their tummy for about 20 minutes after feeding - this will help tremendously. When you do lay baby down, try to prop up whatever she is laying on or in, if possible.

6. When we were really at a loss we gave baby colic tablets and mylecon (gas drops) to help ease the tummy.

7.  Make sure their latch is good. Nursing should not hurt but if she is sucking air, that will make it worse - even bottles can allow air into a baby's tummy so watch closely, burp often, and maybe try a few bottles before committing to one brand/style.

8.  Don’t bounce baby - sounds obvious but throwing it out there!

9. I know pacifiers are helpful and pure sanity savers but, if you can stand it, try not to use them. Baby may end up sucking in air and you might not know it.

10. Last but not least, since I was nursing, I got started on a probiotic and (regardless of nursing) we started to give probiotics to baby morning and night. Probiotics help aid in digestion and since that's the root cause of silent reflux, it definitely didn't hurt.

The regimen we had:
Before nursing or bottle feeding:  We gave 1 cell salt and 1 colic tablet. After feeding we gave 1 of each again and some mylecon drops. We also gave her jaro drops, an infant probiotic recommended by our doctor, morning and night. Doing these things consistently was a LIFE SAVER!! It was at the peak of her reflux, around 6-9 weeks. Then she either outgrew it or the stuff worked well!!

We did end up putting our daughter on Zantac for a few weeks for sanity sake. It did help but we gave it sparingly - only at night and not consistently.

Products purchased/used:

Hyland's - Natrum Phos. 6x, 500 tablets https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0014ARBN4/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_9qYFBb61ZG6T7

Hyland's Homeopathic Baby Colic Tablets, 125 Count https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01IYB6RX0/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_TrYFBbVTWSN1J

Mylicon Infant Drops Anti-Gas Relief Dye Free formula, 1.0 Fluid Ounce https://www.amazon.com/dp/B011EVPAHG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_gtYFBbMSCWAVW

Jarrow Formulas Baby's Jarro-Dophilus Drops, 1 Billion Cells Per 6 Drops, Supports Intestinal & Immune Health, 8 ml  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N51XLUX/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_U__VOU.Bb1GAR5CW

I hope these tips help for your sweet baby. If you are nursing, paying for the attention and help of a certified LC is HIGHLY recommended. Also, remember, the diet changes are temporary and hopefully this is, too.

**This is not actual, legal, medical advice, just our experience!**

A letter to new mommas

Dear pregnant/new mom:

I've been thinking about you because I had and still have those same exact feelings of anxiety that you're struggling with before baby arrives. I also struggle with trying to be perfect. In my world, there isn't room for failure. Now that I am a parent, all I seem to do is fail and it's wearing on me.

I don't know if what I am about to say will make a whole lot of sense. I do wish, however, someone had told me these things before now. It's basically a lot of confessing and admitting the downfalls that I have as a person and as a parent.

Lately, the anxiety and the worry about being "good enough" and raising my kids the right way - being kind, with listening ears and obeying hearts - is through the roof. G is at the age where he is testing every possible limit, figuring his own way around his 2 year old world, and learning some hard lessons with lots of tears along the way. On the flip side, he is still the sweetest little kid and I am blessed that he is mine. However, the devil is really at work right now. In church a few Sundays ago, the pastor read a scripture that essentially said demons knew Jesus was the Holy One, Son of God. Satan knows where the links are the weakest in that moment and when to strike.  Praying through fear, praying through weakness has never been easy for me. In my experience, the enemy usually comes at me with a full on assault of my marriage and my self image. Satan knows where God is and he knows when and what to whisper into our desperate ears. He can worm his way into hearts that are desperately trying to overcome fear, desperately wanting to do the right thing, and desperately trying to hold it all together - these are a few of the many examples our world as a parent seem to hang by threads.

I don't say all of that to freak you out. I say it to remind you that God is with you, He is in your marriage, He is a cry out away. And so are your friends and family.

I have a confession: Good parenting is really, really difficult. Keyword here is "good". If it is hard, you're doing something right. I know that sounds crazy and like an oxymoron, but I know it to be true. I can't give you a special formula to get rid of the anxiety or the struggle to be the perfect mom. All I can say is that parenting is an adventure. It is full of the highest highs and some of the lowest lows. It is full of celebration and full of tears. It is the most rewarding job on the planet.

I mainly want you to know that you're not alone. It isn't talked about enough but please remember that there are other moms struggling right along with you and it is okay to reach out and to ask for help. I still don't know how to reach out all the time - to raise the white flag and ask for help. I'm getting there, though. I know that every time I get the courage to confide in someone that I come out feeling not quite as lost or alone. I also know the enemy tries even harder so keep your chin up and your prayers coming! Your spouse will be a major support to you but you'll also find that sometimes you will need a friend or family member to speak truth to you.

The ride is only beginning and I cannot wait for you to see and experience all that God has in store. I'm literally giddy with excitement for you!