6 Things I Do During Pregnancy...And Need To Do After

So, round 3 of pregnancy and I've been wondering this a lot lately. Probably because I've noticed my own behavior! We read articles and talk to friends and get input on what to do during pregnancy, to ensure a healthy and happy baby and momma. But, my question is, why don't we do this all the time? And not just women but, men too.

Here are a few things I've made mental note of recently that I pay much more attention to during pregnancy than during normal life (I say that because at this point in my life, I feel like I am pregnant more often than I am not!).

1. Establishing a good skin care routine.

Our skin does CRAY CRAY things while pregnant. Some of us break out like mad, some of us get pregnancy mask or melasma and some of us clear up like we haven't even hit puberty yet. Regardless, I notice that I pay much closer attention to my skin while pregnant. This is great, yes, but I need to keep it up after pregnancy too because, Lord knows the skin goes bonkers a few times trying to regulate those pesky hormones. 

2. Watching what goes on and in our body

Point #2 goes hand in hand with the above. I don't use products with retinol while pregnant or super harsh chemicals. I do make sure my skin is hydrated (I use this stuff and it's bomb: Active Hydration Body Cream) because with each pregnancy and while nursing, I feel like these babies literally suck me dry (and stretch marks are the devil but are inevitable sometimes). Also, I am not a naturalist by any means but essential oils are amazing for all life seasons and ages and ailments. I tend to run my diffuser into the garbage and douse kids with EO's while pregnant and I should be doing that all. the. time. 

I've also been watching what I eat. Besides the fact that this pregnancy has been full of cravings, I have been super mindful of what's going in my body. Mainly from a weight gaining standpoint but I need to be more consistent during the "off pregnancy" times. Lots of leafy greans, lean proteins, minimal carbs and dairy. But always ice cream. 

3. Working out and/or staying active

No one tells you how your shoulders will ache from carrying a 7 pound baby for 20 minutes. Or how your back will feel like it's going to spasm into oblivion after they've finally latched to nurse and there's no way in hell you're moving to get that boppy. Or how physically demanding labor and c-section recovery can be. But, you figure it out pretty dern fast. I won't say it's too late, but be careful trying to catch up when trying to get those weighted exercises in. Get clearance from your doctor and even still, take it easy. Working out and staying active before and during pregnancy make the transition to newbornhood/motherhood so much easier. You feel yourself faster and don't fatigue as quickly. Your stamina for those 2am parties will astound you. 

Don't stop there - keep up the activity after baby is born. He or she will need you even more outside of the womb. Your physical ability to keep up with mommy duties is overwhelming mentally, but it doesn't have to be overwhelming physically. 

4. Taking vitamins - and lots of them

Kind of like what I am putting into my body, I need to keep in mind the benefits of vitamins and probiotics! Probiotics are so good for baby (I wrote some notes on reflux and it mentions probiotics as a helpful aid) and mommy's gut health. Also, a prenatal may not be enough for you. Consider your food intake - do you need to supplement iron, calcium, DHA, vitamin D and the B's, or did you not get enough fruits and veggies (because all day sickness is REAL) that a food based vitamin could help? I absolutely love all the gummy vitamins - I take several - one with a probiotic, juice plus gummies to help get all those essential fruits and vegetables in, and a prenatal with DHA - I also take an iron supplement. I do all of this while nursing too but then I eventually leave a few off and end up only taking them here and there - bad girl! 

5. Getting enough sleep

Easier said than done while pregnant, I get this. However, I have made it a priority while pregnant - which is weird for me because I am usually one who can operate on little sleep. If you're not getting enough sleep pregnant or not, maybe evaluate what is really keeping you up - do you need to do meditation/prayer before bed to unwind, do you need a new mattress, do you need to politely ask your husband to go in the other room because he snores or wear some ear plugs? Sleep is so important for everyone. It improves brain function in EVERYONE. We encourage our littles to sleep so they can grow big and strong.

Why don't we take it more seriously when we aren't pregnant?

6. Watching my demeanor and tone of voice with my spouse and kids

Oh man, for the sake of all things holy why must hormones make us lose our ever living minds? I would love to go more than a week without wigging out on someone in my house. It is really, really hard and has gotten progressively worse with each pregnancy. I know better. So I need to be better. Grace is tossed around like pixie dust in my house, thankfully! This is a reminder for myself during and after this baby comes! They don't deserve it and I hate how it makes me feel. Keeping calm, generally keeps everyone calm. Apparently that is a harder lesson to learn than it really should be.

The list may sound obvious but point me to one person who is consistent with ALL of these things, ALL the time, so that I may shake their hand.

A Mom, A Sister and A BFF....

A mom, a sister, and a BFF walk into a bar...

Not really but I guess that could be real life?

I recently posted about how my husband cannot be all things to me. To fill in the huge gaps, I have my mom, my sister and my BFF.

My mom, my sister and my BFF are three people I don't praise enough. While my husband, my son and my dad are rightly deserving of my time, attention, and love riddled posts, these three women are three of the many pillars that hold me up.

My mom is like that old friend - you know, the one you don't have to see or talk to all the time but is there when you need her. Conversations with my mom, when there are no distractions and there is a significant topic to cover, are fruitful, calming, comforting, and usually eye opening. We don't have the picture perfect mother/daughter relationship ie. we don't take selfies together. We butt heads. We tell each other things in not always pleasant tones. However, we both know that we love each other with everything we have. I know that I can call her, day or night, and rant or rave about any number of things and she will listen and provide the best feedback (even if it's nothing at all). We understand one another. We stick up for one another. We support one another. We listen to one another. We help one another.

My sister is in a category all on her own. Not because she is just THAT fantastic, but I think sisters deserve their own category. She is different than a mom, and not quite like a BFF. She comprises many of those two people in one - maybe it's because she is older??? This woman is like my "mom-idol". She is seriously the best at all things baby and she is the most creative and involved teacher I know. There is no way in heck I would have survived "mom year 1"...and my son's birthday party would have looked like an epic pinterest fail without her. I look up to her because of our differences... there are many. I've learned to embrace those differences because that's when I learn the most. I like to think we compliment each other...maybe that's because I'm younger? We will never be the same and I wouldn't want it any other way. She keeps me rational, sticks up for me, validates my complaints, lets me make mistakes, is there for me when I do, and I can always count on her to boss me around... even as I approach the age of 30. I wouldn't want it any other way.

My BFF is not your run-of-the-mill kind of girl. She is a selfless, transparent, empowering, and an all together beautiful human being. The amount of "real" I can be with her may be scary to some, but it is such a relief, and it's not just because I've known her half my life. Knowing she can easily call me a selfish brat while at the same time making me feel like a million bucks (which happens about 4 times a week) but finds a way to do it with such grace, is pretty damn special. But on the reals, her friendship is one of a kind. Her ability to uplift, help rationalize, and lend a listening ear is second to none and HOPEFULLY she feels the same about me. This BFF thing should definitely be 50/50. If you don't have one of these, pray for one, because everyone needs one!

The common denominator in all three of these amazing women, is their importance to me. I am very thankful for them, their love and their support. They each bring a special element of perspective into my life and have all taught me so much about "things" and myself.

Can't Stop, Won't Stop...

Well, I did it. I started my own business. It is an online women's boutique! I've only shared this dream of mine with a select few people and it's finally becoming a reality!

I did all the right things before starting... I had the idea, the passion, I sent prayers and consulted with my husband. I had the most realistic dream about it, read a book and some articles....then it hit me like a ton of bricks, pushing me right over the cliff... and so began LucyGrant.

I'm working on the website...I've purchased inventory... I've researched and advertised and set up all sorts of accounts... I've taken pictures and posted and reposted... But, I haven't made it big yet... YET!

Starting a business is truly a test of many things.

My patience has been tested
My self confidence has been tested
My faith has been tested
My abilities have been tested

But...

I know in my heart this is what I want to do. I know that through this new adventure, and trusting God, that I'll be able to glorify Him and His goodness.

Now for something you might not know...

I want to utilize my new business to inspire women. I want to empower them. I want to spread beauty and love. I want to help build up, restore and encourage. Self image, self worth, self confidence are all MAJORLY important to me. My hope is that, through LucyGrant, I will be able to reach the hearts of many and help them to know their worth in His name via encouraging messages, a new blog, and maybe the sale of a few pieces of clothing... in His name and not in vain.

The Struggle is Real

I don't know about you but I am the kind of person that needs to constantly keep moving forward - in all things: work, relationships, goals, life in general... but this poses a problem when the one thing I truly desire more than anything is relationships with people.

"Why is that a problem?" you may ask.

Mainly because, and this may come a shock to some as it has to me, but not everyone craves relationship. Come to find out, many are OKAY with moving on from whatever relationship they had with you. Whether is be an ex-boyfriend and the horrible break up that was had, or leaving a job and the coworkers you cared about, losing a friend for one reason or another, or realizing that people are comfortable with their current group of "people" and aren't interested in expanding... it sucks no matter what the circumstance. Maintaining, mending, and fostering relationships is hard work.

I also know there are two sides to every story. Maybe someone did try and then they gave up. That makes my little heart sad. I've had to give up before and giving up is not something I deal well with, even if it is inevitable. Maybe it's a "closure" issue... but it's a nagging feeling and it's very hard for me to accept that something has come to an end.

With the holidays upon us, take the time to reach out to someone, make an effort to make amends, offer support, lend an ear, or simply take the time to say "hello". This can be a very lonely time of year for many people.

Update: currently realizing that 1. I may have been nixed from a book club I was part of and 2. Even reaching out to an old friend re: a topic you used to find great joy in sharing, may not prove to be fruitful. Really praying for understanding... These circumstances, while they may seem small to some, are very hard for me. But this is real life, and even though I know some parts of the "why," I may never fully understand....

Merry Christmas!

We have a 1 year old... Holy!

Time sped up the moment our little was born.

I have no idea how 12 months flew by, but they did.

Some days I didn't know if I would make it through the first year, and other times I felt on top of the world.

My husband and I were challenged in ways we never thought possible - how much we could love another person besides one another, how many times we would say "no", the ways we would deal with each other, and how we chose to parent.

It is important to remember the good and the not so good... here is what I want to remember.

• How alert he was as a newborn
• His "O" face
• The way his head was shaped by the vacuum 
• How beautiful his eyes are 
• The way his hair grew in, like a toupee
• His dancing and wiggling when music comes on
• His first steps in his 10th month
• The way he throws himself, arms wide open, at people
• When he shakes his head after being told "no-no"
• The time he climbed up on the fireplace
• How contently he will sit and listen to a story 
• The moments we share while nursing 
• His blow out diapers and some of the craziness associated 
• Bath time and his love for splashing water everywhere
• The way he says "mom" and "dada"
• How he points at stuff and says "dat" 
• His infectious laugh
• How he throws balls then waves his arm
• When he says "ah da" for "all done" and waves his hands
• How surprisingly easy it was to sleep train him 
• When he got his first two teeth at 3 months old 
• How excited he gets when he is on his little trampoline 

And I'm sure there is so much more. 

The one thing I want to remember, above all else, is the amazing feeling of unconditional love and being able to see it and be reminded of it on a daily basis 

Lessons learned

I've had quite a few jobs in my day - too many - however, I have learned some valuable lessons at each and I continue to learn even now.

 

Learning keeps us young and I plan to stay young for quite some time, thank you!

Job #1 - I learned the value of my position and appreciation from fellow employees only came with tenure. I should have held onto that because since job #1 I have had 6 others since college.

Job #2 - I didn't quite understand doing what you loved was important but I realized that this particular job was not quite what I loved, but I stuck it out for two years anyway. I learned a lot about people at this job - it was the first job where someone openly didn't like me, for no reason. It wasn't until a few jobs later that I understood how unimportant 100% acceptance was.

 

Job #3 - I thought this was the job for me. I loved it. But then I learned the hard way that being a workaholic wasn't very cool. It was a hard fact to face when I still didn't quite understand the difference between being a workaholic and being a hard worker. I got burnt out, landed in a hospital bed, and then shipped by butt back home.

 

Job #4 - I learned that everyone wants to make a buck and sometimes you land in a terrible position because someone made money off of you.

Job #5 - I learned that interviewing your potential employer is just as important as them interviewing you. However, knowing how to sell myself means there are other people who know how to sell themselves. It's a double edge sword - especially when you're faced with an "I CAN'T WIN" scenario - day in and day out.

 

Job #6 - I finally started to get it! I finally started to learn from my past mistakes in job searching and selection. It took four months to find this job, and even in all my desperation, I took this job because I felt it was the right fit for me. Surprisingly, this is where I learned the most about myself, what is important to me, and about being a true business woman. This is where I learned that there is NOTHING, absolutely NOTHING you can do to make certain people like you, let alone tolerate your existence. I still have to protect myself and I don't even work there anymore. I realized that there are people in this world who are truly missing out on what life has to offer because they are so concerned with comparing what they have, or don't have, to some outrageous and unjustifiable standard. I also realized that the "mean girls" in high school, also existed in the real world, and there again, is no explanation for it.

 

As much as I loved and enjoyed the work I was doing, I accepted the fact that I could not do it all, I could not wear 500 hats, and I could not balance 100 plates. End of story. I learned what a Queen Bee was and that I was a victim. Also, that any male boss is likely to be oblivious to the workings of a Queen Bee. Which really sucks. But then I decided that could be another learning point. I learned how to be tough, be a business woman, and let it "roll off like Teflon" as a friend has been telling my since college, and that there is always tomorrow. I learned to control my emotions and the difference between hard work and workaholic (finally!). I learned to do what I could, to do what I knew was right and that God would protect me from any evil doers. I noticed that praying throughout the day, asking God for protection and wisdom, were the ropes that pulled me through each day. And then I moved to be with G.

Job #7 - I don't love this job. I don't hate this job. I am good here. I have a work/life balance. I make a good living. I have Christian coworkers and an understanding boss. I have finally realized that I need to just sit and wait on God. I might be here 6 months or 6 years. There is room for advancement but I won't kill myself getting there. I haven't encountered any Queen Bees and I get to eat good food all week - it is a restaurant group after all.

 

I am in the process of fully understanding what it means to live life to the fullest. I am a dreamer and a planner and an inventor of all things outlandish. My mind never stops thinking about, "what next". What I want for my life one day might change 100 times (thankfully, G is a patient man!). To really take advantage of each day might mean one thing to me, and mean something totally different to next guy. To me it means, spending quality time with G, making time for the fun things (like shopping) and working in the not so fun chores of life (like cleaning), taking each opportunity to see family and friends, to leave work on time, to plan and talk about exciting events in your life (like a wedding, honeymoon, and eventually a new home and babies), to go on dates and eat fancy meals, to get out of town, to dream, and to just be me.

 

Don't let your life pass you by...you only get one of them. It saddens me when people say "I can't do this or that". You're the only person stopping you. You can take a vacation. You can go to lunch with your best girlfriends. You can fall in love all over with your spouse. You can make someone's day. You can sell your stuff and become a gypsy! Take what you learn every day and apply it to the next. Don't stop dreaming and believing that the world is your oyster, because it is, even if all you want to do is sit on the couch and watch TV. There are lots of lessons to learn in life that will shape you into who you are and can help get you to who and where you want to be. Keep living. Keep dreaming. You're allowed.